Notes On Getting Through Painful Procedures

If you’re reading this post on a website about childrens’ pain,  I think you’re going to recognise the feeling I’m about to describe.

Yesterday I took my daughter for a set of x-rays.

I was dreading it.

As I expected, she was required to hold many different positions so that her joints could be accurately filmed.

Some of the positions were extremely painful for her.

The woman taking the x-rays was as business like as a person can be.

As I tried to help my daughter accommodate requests the woman seemed impatient.

My daughter sat white faced with tears rolling down her cheeks.

I watched as images transformed from fuzzy  to clear black and white.

Joint after joint.  X-ray after x-ray.

I encouraged my daughter.  I looked into her eyes.  “Nearly there Sweetheart.  Just one more on the shoulder.”

The positions hurt her and today she is back on very strong pain medication.

I feel so sad.  I know that the x-rays will help inform her treatment but I still feel awful.

It’s not fun when the steps forward feel like steps backward.

I don’t often cry but yesterday I sat in a cafe and cried.

I held my daughters hand.  We have been through so many moments just like this one.

Right there, right then, it all felt SO overwhelming.

Then that feeling passes.  It just slips back into daily life.

We stop for a treat on the way home.

We move on.

We are warriors.

You are too.