I think the reason I put off focusing on the medications is that while I am doing it I have to really concentrate on each pill, the dose and the regularity.
I worry about the effect the medications are having on her and I wish she didn’t have to take them.
The medicine box ritual also forces me to focus on the pain she is managing and I know I try to block that out and pretend she is a normal teenager.
As the winter and the rain have set in our household has had it’s share of seasonal viruses.
I have a big chicken stock bubbling on the stove as part of my response.
I have a recipe that includes sea vegetables for extra minerals. It strikes me that there is a long tradition of women brewing good food to get their families through the winter.
A few nights ago we had my husbands parents over for dinner. I made a decision to cook a season vegetable dish that took some time. I served this vegetable gratin with roast lamb and potatoes.
There we three teenagers at the table and the noise of several conversations filled the room. The baking dishes stayed on the table so people could serve themselves second helpings.
I understand that something really important happens when there is a lot of good food and the family gathers for a feast.
We strengthen our bodies and our souls. We remind ourselves of the tribal strength of family. After a big meal like this I feel we travel better as a family. We are anchored and reassured and able to face moments we would rather not.
So this morning I will attend to the pill box and watch the anxiety come and watch it go away again. Then I will make soup.
Soup photo by lotterymonkey at Flickr Creative Commons.